The Tender Bar: A Book Review

The Tender Bar: A Book ReviewFinding an excellent Coming-of-Age novel can be a hard task and reading a book usually takes much longer than viewing a film.ย  Which is why, despite my best intentions to cover the Coming-of-Age genre in all areas of the arts, theSkykid.comโ€™s book section has not been updated for a while.

That being said, I am often fortunate that when I choose a title to read, the story quite often grabs me and, as result, I canโ€™t wait to share my impressions of it with the readers of TheSkyKid.com. I pick books that tell stories about growing up, Coming-of-Age and books in which the protagonist is invariably male. That gender decision has to do with the fact that I am much more likely to identify with a male character (being a male myself) and I consider character identification one of the most important benefits of a book.

When I selected The Tender Bar by J.R Moehringer, I didnโ€™t know what to expect. I was drawn by the cover image, which portrayed a young boy peeking curiously from behind a bar counter. I knew the book was written as a memoir so, therefore, I expected the story to be told in the first person. And I was not disappointed.

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The action takes place in the town of Manhasset, on Long Island in New York — a โ€œhard-drinking townโ€, as the author describes it. And in that place, the young boy J.R., forms an intriguing relationship โ€“ one not commonly associated with the proper relationships that society imposes on youth โ€“ a relationship with a bar room (tavern) and the men who frequented it.

An only child abandoned by his father, J.R. needed guidance on his way to manhood — a model to followโ€ฆ

ย โ€œโ€ฆ I needed men as mentors, heroes, role models, and as a kind of masculine counterweight to my mother, grandmother, auntโ€ฆ.โ€ย 

The bar is filled with colorful characters that amuse the boy, who was initially sent to it to get cigarettes for his uncle Charlie.

ย โ€œAt eight years old I began to dream of going to Dickens as other boys dream of visiting Disneyland.โ€œ

But despite the on-going presence of the bar in J.Rโ€™s life, he doesnโ€™t spend his entire time there:

โ€œ..I went into the world, worked and failed, played the fool, had my heard broken and my threshold tested…โ€œ

And those voyages are what the book is really about โ€“ voyages representing the Coming-of-Age experiences of the author. He leads the reader through the story of his childhood years, through his time as a teen and in college, and then through the trials and tribulations of early adulthood.ย  An engaging story filled with wisdom and funny passages — it will not only make you smile, but will bring back a lot of your childhood memories.

Most of us have special places that we identify with our childhoods.ย  For me one of those places is the house of my grandparents, where I used to spend warm summer days swimming in the river and playing in the nearby hills.

Having a bar room as a memory anchor seems, at first, quite unusual and intriguing, but before you dismiss such a possibility the author informs us:

โ€œHad I grown up beside a river or an ocean, some natural avenue of self-discovery, I might have mythologized it. Instead I grew up 142 steps from a glorious old American tavern, and that has made all the difference. โ€œ

James Michael Tyler interviews Pulitzer prize-winning journalist J.P. Moehringer author of The Tender Bar

The Tender Bar offers an immense account of interpersonal relationships as the young J.R. explores the world around him.ย  He receives a lot of advice, makes mistakes and learns from them, and thus shapes his personality while simultaneously exposing the reader to what I believe to be invaluable lessons about life.

โ€œYou must do everything that frightens you, J.R., everything. I am not talking about risking your life, but everything else.โ€œ

I was able to find a lot of similarities between the J.R. experiences and my own — especially in regard to his relation with girls/women, his college days and his struggle to justify the years spent in preparing himself for a bright future.ย  But even if you are not able to relate to J.R.โ€™s experiences, you are guaranteed to appreciate the skillful way in which they are told, his tasteful humor and self-irony.

The memoir of J.R. Moehringer is a prime example of an excellent Coming-of-Age novel — a classic Bildungsroman โ€“ in which the goal is maturity and in which the protagonist achieves it gradually and with difficulty. It has a potential to appeal to a wide age range of readers from teenagers to elders and delivers hours of unforgettable reading experiences.

Highly recommended!

The Tender Bar: A Memoir at Amazon.com

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